What Is a Divorce Coach and Do You Need One?

If you’re thinking about a divorce or in the early stages of one, you may be surprised by just how many different divorce professionals exist to guide you through the process. There are family law attorneys, mediators, financial advisors, and therapists, just to name a few. It can honestly feel overwhelming.

And now you might have heard about something called a “divorce coach.” 

Exactly what is a divorce coach, and do you need one? If you’re feeling confused, that’s understandable. Divorce coaching is a relatively new service offering in the divorce space, but one that is growing in popularity. 

Think of a divorce coach as your personal guide through the process. They’re not here to replace your attorney or therapist, but rather to fill a unique role that bridges practical support with emotional guidance. 

In this article, we’ll walk you through everything you need to know about divorce coaching. 

What Is a Divorce Coach?

A good divorce coach is someone who is incredibly organized, level-headed, and trained to provide both practical guidance and emotional support to clients through the divorce process. Think of them as your personal advocate and strategist rolled into one – someone who’s entirely focused on helping you move through this challenging time with clarity and confidence. 

While individual divorce coaches can vary greatly in their philosophy and the specific services they provide, they typically take a holistic approach to the divorce process, helping you see the big picture and make decisions that align with your goals and values. 

Their main job is to empower you to make informed choices about your divorce while providing the emotional support you need to stay grounded throughout the process. 

Most divorce coaches come from backgrounds in counseling, social work, mediation, or related fields. They may also have specialized training or certifications in divorce coaching. 

The key thing to understand is that divorce coaches won’t make decisions for you or tell you what to do with your divorce. Instead, their job is to help you clarify your thoughts, explore your options, and feel more empowered as you move through your divorce and start the next chapter of your life. 

What Does a Divorce Coach Do?

Now that you have a general idea of what a divorce coach is, you might be wondering, “But what does a divorce coach actually do?” 

Again, every divorce coach is different. Some lean more heavily into helping you work through legal issues. Others focus more on emotional well-being and rebuilding your life during and after the divorce. You can even find divorce coaches who specialize in certain types of clients, like those who only work with men or who primarily work with older divorcees. 

With that said, most divorce coaches provide similar services. 

Your coach will sit down with you and help you map out what needs to happen and when. They’ll work with you to identify your priorities and create a realistic divorce plan. 

Divorce coaches can also assist you with:

• Communication planning: How to have productive conversations with your spouse, your children, and your attorney.
• Decision-making guidance: Walking through major choices like whether to keep the family home, how to structure custody arrangements, or what your financial priorities should be.
• Emotional support and coping strategies: Helping you process the complex feelings that come up and develop healthy ways to manage stress and uncertainty.
• Organization and paperwork management: Keeping track of important documents, deadlines, and appointments so nothing falls through the cracks.
• Preparation for important meetings: Getting you ready for meetings with attorneys, mediators, or your spouse so you feel confident and clear about your goals.
• Co-parenting support: Helping you establish new routines with your children.

What’s the Difference Between a Divorce Coach and a Therapist?

You’re not the only one wondering about the difference between a divorce coach and a therapist. Both divorce professionals provide emotional support, and there’s definitely some overlap in what they do. Dig a little deeper, though, and you’ll find that they serve distinct roles.

The main difference between a divorce coach and a therapist comes down to focus and approach. A divorce coach is forward-focused. They help you navigate the specific challenges of divorce and make decisions about your immediate future. 

A therapist, on the other hand, is more likely to help you work through deeper emotional issues, such as past traumas and mental health concerns. They might spend time exploring your past, understanding patterns in your relationships, and helping you heal from emotional wounds. Therapists are also trained to diagnose and treat mental health conditions, like depression or anxiety, that might surface during divorce. 

Importantly, you don’t need to choose between working with a divorce coach or a therapist. Both of these divorce professionals can complement each other, providing a more comprehensive level of support. 

What’s the Difference Between a Divorce Coach and a Divorce Lawyer?

The difference between a divorce attorney and a divorce coach is a little more cut and dry. Your divorce lawyer handles all the legal aspects of your divorce, while your coach gives you more general divorce guidance. 

Your divorce attorney represents you in court, files legal documents, negotiates settlements, and makes sure your rights are protected under the law. They’re the one who knows all the legal ins and outs of divorce in your state. They also help you divide assets, determine custody, and finalize your divorce decree. If it’s a legal issue, leave it to your family law attorney. 

Divorce coaches typically don’t give legal advice, but they do help you navigate the emotional and logistical challenges that come with divorce. For example, while they usually won’t dig into the nitty gritty of property division or child custody laws, they can help you think through what you actually want and need on these issues so that you have clear priorities and goals. 

Divorce coaches and divorce lawyers can work well together. Your coach can help you prepare for meetings with your attorney, organize your thoughts and documents, and make sure you’re using your attorney’s time (and your money) efficiently. Meanwhile, your attorney handles the legal heavy lifting. 

Should You Hire a Divorce Coach?

Is hiring a divorce coach a good option for you? That really depends on whether you feel you could use some extra support and guidance through your divorce. 

You might want to consider divorce coaching if any of these sound familiar:

• You’re feeling completely overwhelmed by everything
• You want to keep your divorce as civil as possible
• You’re worried about how the divorce will affect your children
• You’re a planner by nature
• You need help staying focused on what matters
• You want practical, judgment-free support
• You’re looking for guidance on rebuilding as you start your post-divorce life

Of course, wanting a divorce coach and affording a divorce coach are two separate things. If you want to hire a divorce coach to be part of your divorce team, you’ll need to be able to pay their bills. 

How Much Does a Divorce Coach Cost?

Let’s talk money and divorce coaching. Divorce coaches typically charge by the hour. Expect to pay anywhere from $75 to $200 per hour, depending on where you live and the coach’s experience and credentials.

Some coaches also offer package deals, such as a set number of sessions for a flat fee or specific packages tailored to your support needs. 

A few things can impact price:

• Location: Coaches in major metros usually charge more than those in smaller towns.
• Experience: Coaches who have been working for longer and who have advanced certifications will likely cost more than coaches who are newer to the field.
• Specialized services: Some coaches specialize in high-conflict divorce or complex financial situations. These professionals may charge more than generalists. 

One important thing to keep in mind is that, unlike therapy, divorce coaching usually isn’t covered by insurance. That means you’ll need to pay for your sessions out of pocket. 

But before you decide that divorce coaching is too expensive, consider that working with a divorce coach might actually save you money in the long run. If a coach helps you clarify your priorities and stay focused on what really matters, you might avoid some costly legal battles with your ex or even lower the amount of time (i.e. chargeable hours) you spend with your attorney. 

Plus, if coaching helps you make better decisions now, you could walk away from your divorce with fewer regrets and fewer expensive modifications down the road. 

How to Find and Choose a Divorce Coach

If you’re on the hunt for a divorce coach, look for someone who’s qualified, experienced, and feels like a good fit for your personality and situation. Many good coaches have certifications or licenses in counseling, social work, or mediation. They may also have specific coaching credentials. 

Most divorce coaches also offer a free or low-cost consultation. This is your chance to ask all your important questions and to get a feel for whether the coach is a good personality fit for you. 

Here are some questions to ask during your initial consultation with a potential divorce coach:

• What’s your training and experience in divorce coaching?
• How long have you been doing this work?
• What’s your coaching approach or philosophy?
• Can you provide references for past clients?
• What does your typical process look like? 

Trust your instincts. You want to work with someone who makes you feel heard and supported, not judged or rushed. 

Making the Right Choice for Your Divorce Journey

Figuring out the kind of support you need during your divorce is all part of the journey. A divorce coach can be a valuable addition to your team if you’re looking for personalized guidance and some extra emotional support. 

While divorce coaches aren’t therapists or attorneys, they can help you stay organized, make thoughtful decisions, and maintain your emotional well-being through your divorce and beyond. 

Whether you decide to work with a divorce coach or not, the most important thing is that you don’t face your divorce completely alone. There are resources available to help you, including Second Saturday Divorce Workshops. 

Each workshop features divorce professionals who work in your local area. They can walk you through different aspects of divorce and answer your personal questions. Second Saturday Workshops are a great way to explore your options and connect with local experts. 

Find a Second Saturday Divorce Workshop near you.